This Picture Sucks

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and so do yours

#14. Fake polaroids and film borders

Marco Polo would be lost looking for something that screams wannabe more than using a $2000 computer and $500 piece of software to try and emulate the look of a $15 camera and a $1 piece of film. It makes you wonder where evolution stopped and the internet kicked in, I’m gonna say it was around where someone set up a mySpace page for their WoW guild.

I’m going to ignore the obvious failure that often surround film borders: faking roll film on a number of pics without changing the frame number, color pics on b&w stock, inverted slide film, etc. There’s a lot of it pitfalls, but like VD, they can be avoided if you think for a moment.

Just look at this black and white Fujifilm Velvia shot I found. Goddamn amazing:

It’s also a self portrait for a 365 project. Fail triptych.

What’s harder to fake is the fact that the images coming out of your cheap-ass DSLR or P&S are nothing like the images that come out of a medium/large format or polaroid cam. Did you know that most polaroid cams have, at most, two apertures? And that the image size is as big as the end print. Those cams just cannot pull off that “sharp from 20 inches to infinity” look your cell phone gives you. Large format images just flat out look different. Ask yourself, are you really doing your photography to impress people that are impressed by cheap gimmicks?

Yeah, you probably are.

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Filed under: thelist

2 Responses

  1. dawg says:

    Awesome site dude. Thanks for telling people what’s ridiculous. If enough people do this maybe people will stop being so god damn ridiculous too. Actually I don’t think they will, but it’s good to have an extra opportunity to laugh our arses off.

  2. bryan says:

    THANK YOU.
    GODDAMN.

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